Things that have made me appreciate los angeles

To me, LA has always been best defined by its paradoxes. You can be in a noisy concrete city and then drive 10 minutes into a silent tree-lined suburb. It’s beautiful and it’s hideous. It’s inspiring and it’s soul-crushing. It’s a thousand cities and realities sewn together with loose threads. Two people ten miles away from each other can live unrecognizably different lives.

My feelings about it have also always been contradictory. 

I complain about it all the time, but I also think it's one of the coolest cities ever. I’ve felt the most joy and the most despair of my life during my time here.

I couldn’t wait to leave. But when my visa runs out, out of anywhere in the world I could go, including many objectively better places, I really hope I come back here. 

I thought maybe that thought was just out of habit, or Stockholm Syndrome, and that once I actually left I would realize I wouldn’t care about ever returning. But I still feel the same way so far. 

I wasn’t expecting that. LA was never glamorous to me. it was always just the kind of ugly but kind of interesting place my family drove to on holidays to visit my cousins growing up. When I first came here for school, I didn’t really have many feelings about LA. If anything, I leaned more negative. I didn’t assume I’d leave, but I definitely didn’t assume I’d stay.

I’ve been trying to stop pretending like i know the future, or that what I want will always stay the same. Because I’m wrong just as often as I’m right. So I don’t know for sure if i’ll be here long term, but i can easily see that possibility.

I think that’s partly why I wanted to leave so bad. I’ve never left California. If I come back, I don’t want to have only ever lived in California. I really needed a change.

If I stay here, I want it to be because I chose to come back, not just because it was easier to never leave. 

I’ve been keeping a notes doc open for the past few months of moments and details that have made me feel grateful that I lived in LA. Because I'm trying to be more ✨positive✨. And I thought it would be fun and cute. The list might sound very sunshine and rainbows. Believe me, I could come up with a long list of things I don't like about LA too. And some of the items on this list would also show up on that list too. But nowhere is perfect. And the good here outweighs the bad for me.

Tbh making this list made me feel like kind of an obnoxious transplant. I get really annoyed when people make whatever place they live in their whole personality, and both LA and California in general are highly prone to that.

I don’t like thinking of LA as a major city, or as a physical representation of some sort of moral value, or status, or industry. 

I like it most when I think of it as just a place, the place where I live and where other people live. It’s barest and most boring description. I think I only started to love it when it became kind of boring and ordinary to me. Because that when it started to feel like home. 

There’s a lot a list doesn’t capture. It kind of doesn't do it justice. I could make a similar list about a lot of places. Maybe even a much longer list. Or a more exciting list. 

A lot of the things that make LA special to me are things that are hard to express in words. Memories, and feelings, and images, that I can’t and don’t even want to attempt to describe. The simple sense that it feels like home.

But here’s some of that list anyway, in no particular order:

a jog around Silver Lake Reservoir at sunset 

pupusa stands  

the ocean

I recently realized that I’ve never lived more than an hour away from the Pacific. I really love the ocean. When I think of peace, I think of water. My whole life, I’ve found it comforting that it’s just west of me. Whenever I’m feeling stressed or sad, I like to go to the ocean by myself and watch the waves push and pull

seeing internet microcelebrities

my favorite hikes

My favorite was Eaton Canyon before it burnt down. But it’ll grow back

how It can feel like both a big chaotic city and a peaceful suburb depending on which neighborhood you’re in 

I used to not like this. But I grew to really like it because you have access to a lot of very different vibes depending on your mood

all the local produce at the farmers markets

This is maybe more of a California thing. We have the best produce in the country in my opinion. And the longest seasons for fruits and vegetables. For SoCal specifically, I like how avocados are cheap here and how passion fruit grows here

dinner with friends at Joy 

strange sightings 

backyard concerts 

billboard lawyers 

My favorite is rabbilawyer.com

jacaranda season

fruit cart guys  

I love fruit 

seeing Shawn Mendes on a hike one time

It was so exciting

when people clap for Nicole Kidman at AMC 

When this happens, I know it’s gonna be a good crowd. Times this has happened in semi-recent memory: Megalopolis, Minecraft, the 20th Anniversary rerelease of Pride and Prejudice, the 20th Anniversary rerelease of Brokeback Mountain

when I realize the kind of random place I’m at is referenced in a Lana Del Rey song 

endless speciality and ethnic grocery stores 

I love grocery stores. I've found a lot of great ones through @grocery_goblin

how easy it is get a really nice lunch for $10 or less 

My favorite spots for this are Holbox, Yama Sushi Marketplace, Grandma’s Deli Babuska, Leo’s Tacos, Azizam, and Pupusas Delmy

the possibility of seeing Angelyne’s pink convertible 

One of my old roommates saw it once

all of the film screenings and lectures that I didn’t go to enough 

seeing my actor friends in plays 

hearing about people’s creative projects all the time 

This does get annoying sometimes but generally I really like hearing what people are up to. Even if what they are doing is not always all that good. Though it also often is. I also think it’s motivating that there’s social pressure to always be working on something creative in certain circles

how a lot of people here identify themselves based on their passions and not their technical occupations 

Like if someone is an aspiring actor, they will often introduce themselves as an actor and whatever they do to make a living (probably a waiter) doesn’t usually come up at first because it’s not as interesting to you or to them as the thing they are actually hoping to devote their life to

finding an entire new street or neighborhood in an area I was convinced I had seen everything of 

This happened right before I left. I was hiking near Franklin Canyon with a friend and on the drive back we passed by this really cute little hippie neighborhood in Laurel Canyon that I never knew existed. It’s hard to feel truly bored. There's always a possibility of something new

whenever there is a disaster, people here aggressively step up to volunteer and help out 

People are just very involved in general, given that there are a lot of issues. There is a lot of sadness here but also a lot of hope. One of my old professors once told my class a story about a guy he knows who has been sweeping one street in Skid Row every Sunday morning without fail for 20 years and doesn't tell anyone about it. I regret not getting more involved with things myself

how the entire LA basin lights up with illegal fireworks on the Fourth of July

a warm day with a cool ocean breeze 

so many movie and tv billboards

that working in entertainment is a (sort of) serious and (sort of) respectable career path

Until college, I didn’t think it was possible to have a somewhat stable career in the arts. Even though they are hard to get here, a lot of those careers don’t even exist in any other U.S. cities besides maybe NYC

that not everyone here works in entertainment 

‘Cause that would be boring. I really like science and technology, but now so many people in San Francisco work in science and technology that it feels really homogenous and kind of suffocating. It feels way more balanced here

really deranged signs/ads on street posts 

my friends 

my family 

going to the A Good Used Book Sunday market with my old roommates 

running into people I went to school with on the street 

Also a con sometimes tbh, but I usually like to catch up with people and I think it adds a sense of community

driving up 101 along the coast to visit my family in SF 

I like stopping along all the little towns like Solvang and Paso Robles 

debating the best overpriced K-Town matcha spots with my old coworkers

My personal favorite is Yeems

getting Korean food in K-Town late at night 

playing tennis at Plummer Park and getting free coaching from the old tennis guys who hang out there 

special shoutout to John

all the furniture on the side of the road 

I know it’s probably an eyesore to most, but I’ve always thought it was fun to see the furniture and a good way to reuse items instead of throwing them out. Sometimes, there’s really interesting stuff or stuff in really nice condition

plants

The succulents and trees and plants that grow in people’s yards and around the sidewalks are really pretty. I like how lush and overgrown they are in some neighborhoods like Silver Lake or the hills

unique businesses 

getting chilaquiles at Gloria’s Cuisine every Thanksgiving morning with my family

the widespread availability of usually really hard to find Mexican ingredients 

Like epazote and mamey and fresh masa for tortillas, I never used to be able to find those easily

getting a really well made cappuccino at one of my favorite cafes by one of my favorite baristas 

My favorites are Stereoscope, Be Bright Coffee specifically when the owner is working 'cause he's the best barista

making fun of Silver Lake men at bars 

One of my friends and I always talked about starting The Silver Lake Man Project, where we’d take a headshot of every man between the ages of about 21-39 in Silver Lake and use them to make a composite image of a final singular Silver Lake Man

making fun of Venice men at bars 

when Jack Black was the guest of honor at a Día de Muertos festival that was down the block from my apartment one year 

Latino king

driving past a hideous strip mall for months and then one day realizing there is a really cool business or restaurant hidden in there 

wandering around an overpriced vintage market with friends 

Mercado la Paloma 

I love going there alone with a book and hanging out. It’s so cozy, and all the waiters know me. I buy fresh masa here

how there are people from literally every walk of life you can imagine 

walking around a new neighborhood

faloodeh at Mashti Malone’s on a hot day

watching The Holiday in LA

I love The Holiday I think it's such a great representation of LA's vibe at it's best

seeing a Midsummer Night’s Dream in the middle of the forest in Topanga at the Will Greer Theatre 

walking around the Grove or Century City late at night with friends after seeing a 10:30 movie at AMC

overhearing really cool and/or interesting conversations 

I love listening to people’s conversations in public. And there’s nowhere that’s more fun for that than LA to me. Sometimes they’re really stupid and vapid. Sometimes they are super interesting and intellectual. They are often really fun.

Semi-recent favorites: Two dads with kids in strollers getting lunch loudly debating whether you need to learn music theory to truly be a good musician (neither of them knew music theory themselves and both were hobbyists, which I know because they both kept on saying “but what do I know, I’m no professional”) really loudly, a sociology PhD candidate explaining his thesis on dog park social hierarchies to his friend at a cafe, a professor at CalTech talking about how to get engineering students to do more project-based learning

A highlight for me is hearing adults talk about the arts. Growing up, I rarely remembered hearing “real” responsible adults seriously or enthusiastically talking about books or movies or music. I worried that when I was a “real” adult that I would stop being interested enough to keep talking about it too. But here, I hear those conversations all the time

the time I was waiting in line at Fedex and it took a long time bc the old guy in front of me was printing a like 200 page screenplay 

That’s so silly 

getting hair supplies at Larchmont Beauty Center and hearing the Iranian guys who run it get into loud arguments with customers about which volume of developer to use 

They're also really nice and give me free samples sometimes

graffiti 

easy access to breakfast burritos 

It’s my favorite breakfast food

peoplewatching

People here are often very interesting (for better or worse)

I feel like LA has a reputation for being rude or cold but I feel like most people are super nice 

how driven and ambitious and hopeful a lot of people who are here are

Whether it’s in their careers or their personal passions

how depending on which scenes or in or neighborhoods you’re in, you can have an entirely different concept of what LA is 

random cute community events

 Like every month there is some lady who hosts a free walking tour of LA trees 

complaining about how LA sucks with other people live in LA 

accidentally attending a packed WeHo city council meeting about traffic safety 

It was about Fountain Ave. The room was overflowing. It was nice to hear how much people cared about their neighborhood during the public comments section. People were also surprisingly super civil and polite, there was only one brawl

when I was walking down one of those random deserted streets that just looks like a row of warehouses for the millionth time, and that one day there happened to be a gallery opening in one of them and the security guard let me in so I could see it 

all the things I never did 

There are so many places I never visited, restaurants I never tried, day trips I didn’t take. But I think it’s cool that there are so many things that I wanted to do that I wasn’t able to get to all of them.

Some of the things: day trip to Ojai, tidepooling in Malibu, exploring Topanga more, exploring an area of Laurel Canyon I didn’t know about until recently more, going to more small concerts, seeing a play at The Geffen, volunteering at a horse ranch in Malibu, visiting the Gagosian gallery, trying Armenian bakeries, going to a film lecture at the Academy Museum, trying pastries from a couple who makes Swiss pastries out their apartment and only does a pastry drop once every few months